Respect

I’ve been sitting here trying to figure out what to write about.  I thought I might write about the ten suggestions, formally known as the Ten Commandments, before the politically correct and the I don’t believe in God crowds got wind of them.  Then I remembered my visit to my dermatologist just the other day.  There in the room where I waited was a notice that gave me the topic I’d like to write about.  I will explain later about that notice.

I was brought up in a home where we were taught respect.  I am not sure if very many homes have that particular objective high on the list of things to teach the kids.  There certainly isn’t much respect displayed out there in the public sector.

What is respect?  Aretha Franklin had her definition of respect and she put to song.  Have a listen to what she had to say or rather sing…..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0XAI-PFQcA

I looked it up on line (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/respect) and the definition had me more confused than I was before I looked it up.  I had to get half way down the page before I realized I was looking for the verb form not the noun deal.  That explains my problem with English when I was in High School.

I thought that I actually knew the definition of respect before I looked it up.  Then I discovered that I didn’t know the half of it (what ever that means).  The other night (Tuesday) we had a cook out with the cub scouts.  Before we headed out to try and start the next great wildfire (we can’t let New Mexico out do us) we had our opening exercises.  We do the pledge of allegiance, the scout promise and then an opening prayer.

The boys rushed through the pledge of allegiance with everyone saying it at a different speed.  It was not acceptable.  I stopped them at that point.  I told them what I am about to tell you.  I spent four years in the Navy and seven years as a buck Sergeant in the Army National Guard.  I put my life on the line to defend the flag and all that it stands for.  It deserves respect.  When we (any of us) as Americans say the pledge we should say it with respect.

When I was a young man (in my twenties) I was tough.  I could and did on a few occasions stand toe to toe in a ring and trade punches with someone else foolish enough to do the same.  I could hit a four-inch bulls eye with an M-16 at one hundred yards and do the same thing at fifteen yards with my four inch 38.  I may have had all that tough guy stuff going for me but every time they played the Star Spangled Banner or Anchors Away tears would come to my eyes.  I had learned respect for my country, the flag and the freedom we have here in this wonderful country of ours.

I realized something yesterday when I was talking about this with my teenage granddaughter.  She said something that really makes a lot of sense.  If you are nice to people first it heads off their being rude to you.  Sort of like a pre-emptive “show respect for others” strike.

I started to think about the fact that most people I come in contact with are nice.  Then I thought about what my granddaughter said and wondered how many of them didn’t get the chance to be rude because of my pre-emptive smile.  I draw it like a gun.

The way that we behave in public shows everyone around us how much respect we have inside of us.  Take the characters that use profanity in public places.  I am a firm believer that in some cases profanity is a crutch for people with a limited vocabulary.  In other cases it is a direct result of having no respect for those within earshot.

Have I ever used profanity?  Hey, does a bear defecate in the woods?  Jumped around that one didn’t I.  I was a sailor and a soldier I know a bunch of nasty words you probably haven’t even heard.  Even back then when I was a sailor I had enough respect for others to not use profanity in mixed company or in front of people I didn’t know very well.

Lack of respect seems to be running deep these days.  It’s not gone for good, respect that is, it’s just on an extended vacation.  At least that is what I am hoping for.  Our day-to-day lives can be improved by just a little respect.

At the start of this I mentioned a visit to my dermatologist.  Her name is Annette Headley and she is a great doctor.  When I showed up thirty minutes late for my appointment (I had the incorrect time) she accommodated my error.  Her staff is polite and very nice to talk to.  While I was awaiting her examination I noticed a printed notice on the wall in the examining room.  It basically stated that some patients have exhibited rude and some times abusive behavior towards the staff and noted that if you did that you would be asked to leave and would not be welcomed back.  I can only imagine what would make someone behave that way in her office.  My conclusion was simply a lack of respect laced with liberal amounts of ignorance.

Respect starts with each of us as individuals.  It’s called “Self Respect”.  I’m sure that you have heard of it.  Once you have learned how to respect yourself you can move on to the other forms of respect.  I find it difficult to imagine someone who can’t respect themselves, respecting someone else.

The rules are pretty simple.  To be able to respect yourself you need to emulate those things that generate respect.  Would you respect someone who tells a lie at the drop of a hat?  That would be number nine on the list of ten suggestions.  If the answer to that question is no then you will have trouble having self respect if you lie out of hand to other people.

Here is a list of three things that you can do to build your own self-respect.

1. Be honest (don’t lie)
2. Don’t take things that don’t belong to you (don’t steal)
3. Don’t cheat on you spouse  (commit adultery)

You know what, this is starting to sound like the list of those ten suggestions!  Go figure!!

I guess in the long run it’s like the golden rule with a small modification.  You just need to respect others the way that you would want to be respected.  That isn’t all that hard to do.  And you don’t have to know them to respect them.

Start today for a more respectful tomorrow.  Start by showing respect to our veterans.  Help them any way you can.  In that light, just a reminder that the 50% of the royalties I get are going to help my fellow veterans.

Until next time, keep your powder dry and a smile on your face.  And if you can email me what “Keep your powder dry” means I will reply back with a copy of “A Rare Encounter” for you to read.
 Thank you for your time!!
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Imagination

          It’s midnight; do you know where your imagination is?

          I am nearly sixty-four years old.  That means that I get a senior discount in a whole bunch of places and I get the buy one get one free at the casino buffet on Mondays.  It also means that I can remember a childhood where imagination was what you needed to have to have fun.  What has happened to that wonderful concept?  Where did it go?

          I remember sitting in my bedroom reading a book.  Who does that today?  There are still a few, I suppose, but I am sure that it is a very few.  After all, reading takes imagination.  You see the story in your head.  There are no actors, no special effects, only you, the words in the book and your imagination, a daunting task for some of the youth of today not to mention a whole bunch of adults.

          Yes, I remember sitting there with a reading lamp being the only light turned on in my bedroom.  Can you even buy a reading lamp anymore?  Would they know what you were asking for if you did go to buy one?

          Well, anyway, I was reading the book “When Worlds Collide”.  Philip Wylie and Edwin Balmer wrote it in 1933.  It was a great science fiction story about the world coming to an end.  You can probably still find it in the library. Check it out. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/When_Worlds_Collide)

          My imagination was in overdrive on that one.  I recall quite vividly thinking that getting my homework done didn’t matter much because the world was about to come an end.  Then I remembered that it was just a story.  I was torn between the joy of realizing that the world wasn’t about to end and the sad realization that I had to finish my homework.  I hated homework.

          Imagination was in the drivers seat for just about everyone back then.  Today there is a distinct lack of imagination required for most of us.  I’m beginning to think that the advent of the color TV might have been the start of the decline.  It went down hill from the point where you could tell the color of Hoss Cartwright’s vest.  It was brown by the way.  If you already knew the color of his vest or who he was for that matter, you are as old as I am, or you have Netflix.

 
          Back then, the love scenes were a fade out and you imagined what happened next.  Not now, no imagination is required.  I’m sorry, but I don’t think that was an improvement.  It has also made it impossible for some of us to watch most PG-13 movies with our teenage grandchildren.  If you know the guys or gals that came up with what a thirteen year old is supposed to watch send me his or her address.  I want to give him or her or both for that matter a piece of my mind.

          Take movies today, there may be a shortage of imagination in that department as well.  If it isn’t a remake of an old movie it’s a film version of a comic book.  I think I am becoming cynical, and I don’t even know what that word means.

          I write fiction because it’s my imagination that keeps me going, and besides, real life to scary.  I have always had a problem reading about real life brutality.  It’s the same with movies.  I have never been able to watch “Schindler’s List”. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schindler's_List)  I started to once and I stopped a short way into the film, my apologies to the people who produced it.

          Without imagination there would be no airplanes or cars or a whole bunch of things that make our lives better.  We need to foster it in our children and in my case, grandchildren.  I’m not saying that we should ban all those things that leave out or stifle our imagination.  However we do need to limit them.

          I have told my readers before that I play video games on line.  I have a PS-3 and at present play a game called Call of Duty Black Ops.  It doesn’t require much imagination to play the game.  It’s ironic that some of the things like this video game that require no imagination to play required a great deal of imagination to create.  I guess there was some kind of trade off in there somewhere.

         Do you want to create imagination in your kids?  Read to them when they are small.  If they are older locate some games you can play as a family that require imagination to play and I am not talking about video games.

          Have dinner as a family and tell stories while you are enjoying the food.  Don’t be afraid to talk with your mouth full (although I would caution against laughing with a mouth full of mashed potatoes). 

           Life is full of adventure when you have the imagination to see it.  You are never too young or too old to start on the path to a better and more fulfilling imagination.  You can start today by picking up a book (preferably fiction) and start on page one.  By chapter two you will be off and running.

          I’ve got an idea, you can purchase a copy of my novel “Operation Armageddon” and …  Sorry I couldn’t resist putting in the plug for my novel.

          Anyway, start today and help build a better and more imaginative tomorrow.  Until next time, remember to let your family know that you love them and don’t forget to feed the dog.  If you don’t have a dog, feed the neighbors dog.